Doctors

I took two extra days off before this weekend's exam and boy I needed it! Thursday I saw the orthopedic surgeon about my knee. He keeps a very brisk pace in his office. I was wisked into the X-ray room, then to the office where I was barely seated before they slapped a blood pressure cuff on me (151/97 ouch) and I spent roughly 20 minutes with the doctor. It happened to be a "good day" where my knee wasn't swollen yet and the nasty clicking it does was a few hours away yet. To be fair, I didn't really want to be told I need surgery right now, but I'm keeping in mind that I would like to be under my husband's good union insurance when it does come to that point. The Dr told me, without an MRI, he can tell I have arthritis and a bone spur in/on the knee, but since I'm still getting around OK we are going to be conservative. He's recommending Glucosamine/Chondrointin for 3 months to see if it makes a difference. When the pain and swelling get to be bothersome we'll do a cortisone shot and discuss options. Then he went "there" and told me my natural weight for my height is around 130. He said something about that not being achievable (what?) so I should shoot for getting down to whatever weight I was when I graduated high school. Ummm, that was 30 years ago, do you think I remember? I just threw out a random number of 160. I know I got down into the 140's the summer after, when I had a boyfriend and wanted to look awesome for him. So I guess if I set a weight goal maybe 150 is in between. I was surprised he talked about weight, most doctors don't because it's a touchy subject, but he said it could go a long way with delaying surgery. I get it. One of my immediate thoughts on the way home is, what kind of exercise am I going to do when literally everything bothers my knee? He also told me I can take up to 12 ibuprofen a day. What?! I have always been told not to take it at all because it really raises blood pressure. Ack! I wish doctors would agree on stuff! After that appointment, my husband and I went to drive past a house that we had an appointment to see today. It was so charming, in our budget with a beautiful yard right across from an orchard. We dreamed of it while driving the coast of Lake Michigan taking in amazing views. Then our realtor messaged us to say that house had more than 45 showings booked and wouldn't last until Sunday. Unfortunately, with my exam and my husband's having to work all weekend we couldn't make it work so we had to let go of that one. Sleep deprived and hangry, I cried a little for how hopeless this feels. I saw that house 16 minutes after it went on the market and the vultures descended on it and I'm sure drove the price way up. In my emotional mind I began to feel like all the odds are stacked against us, and several times throughout the day I had to choke back tears of tired disappointment. We did have a nice lunch out before driving home for me to get to the endodontist. The short of it: the dentist who did the root canal never got rid of the infection before doing the root canal so now the infection is sealed inside me and the only way to get it out is surgery. He said it won't get worse and it's not really bothering me except when I floss so I'm going to put that off for now. Yesterday was my medical coding certification exam. I started the program in August and finished in January and gave myself time to study for the test. I didn't study much because it's not really a memorization type of test. That being said, I finished in 5 hours, with 30 minutes to spare but I have no idea how I did. It takes 2 weeks or so to get results. I am not stressed about it. I want to pass but I can always take it again in June. Having a coding job before we move would be so ideal, that way I would not have to worry about committing. It's all a big question mark for now. After my exam I spent time relaxing and letting some stress slide off me. Our realtor pointed out the things she didn't like about that house we couldn't get to and said she thinks we wouldn't have liked it.I started to realize that this could take a lot longer than I expected or want, but it will happen. So I'm learning to be OK with it. I started to think again about what the orthopedic surgeon said about losing weight and how I have been so quasi-committed, and how I worry about my blood pressure but never bother to check it at home. I did lose 5 pounds since starting my plant-forward eating last month, so that's encouraging. I have now made some loose goals for myself that include taking my blood pressure reading consistently, getting more exercise and breaking the conditioning that dinnertime=junk/comfort food and weekends are "anything goes". I am willing to work on it and hope that it does extend the use of my knee along with helping my heart. I'm not all amped up in the way the thought of losing weight to look good used to excite me, but I do think it's time to put my health first. I have been slacking with that part my whole life and my body's showing me why it matters more than how I look or what size dress I wear.

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