Regrouping

Last week was one that helped me learn how important it is to not lose sight of my "why". For me it felt like Mercury in Retrograde came early with a series of missteps and a foul mood and low energy. I found myself carrying over the weekend indulgences with very little mental battle, and I didn't do yoga all week. I still ate my planned food most of the time but there was bread and tortilla chips added. I found myself not so much losing focus but not even caring about the fact that the drive was gone for me. I realize now that I was almost justifying not caring with the excuse that after Aunt Flow comes it is always very easy to be on track. There are a lot of problems with that logic but they are compounded by the fact that she is almost always late and some months it can be more than 2 weeks late. So just because I had Saturday marked as her intended arrival, she might not come until late January. I did have an issue with 2 of my planned meals and ended up wasting them and eating other things, sometimes on plan and sometimes not. I did learn my lesson about one dish and how the ingredients did not reheat well so I won't do that again. I am at a place where I feel uncreative with my food and I'm realizing that I'm trying to make keto easy and convenient and hoping it tastes good and I know that most of the stuff that tastes good isn't easy or convenient. The lack of energy is a real thing, but I also know that I have more energy (at least in the first part of the day) when I do yoga or some other exercise in the morning. It sets up a good foundation and feeling of well-being and I have been missing the mental aspect of it. I stopped my yoga after Day 8 last Sunday. I have been feeling a little under the weather with a slight sniffle and ugly sinus pressure. I am always worried I may have COVID, but I've been lucky both times I have been tested. I was trying to get my booster vaccination on Tuesday but the place didn't have staff so I did get it Friday. I was stressed out wondering if I should because I have heard if you get the vaccine while you have the virus it can be so much worse. Anyway, other than some body aches and this headache I am fine after getting the booster and I'm happy to have it done. We got a snowstorm Friday and Saturday and our pipes froze, which was stressful as first time homeowners. My husband worked this weekend so the boys and I shoveled our steep driveway and steps and I was having a full-blown panic attack about backing down our steep, slippery driveway in my stick shift and yhen getting back up it. My youngest, who has a heart of gold, was giving me a pep talk. I finally just made up my mind that I was going to do it. I figured, both my sons also have anxiety and I have to be a good role model for them. Thankfully I got out OK. I was still shaking and nauseated throughout most of my shopping trip and I bought extra snacks and junk intentionally, knowing I was going to eat it to calm my nerves after getting home. I got up the driveway fine but ended up slipping a few times while unloading the groceries do it was truly slippery enough that I had a right to be concerned. I ate some Combos which I remembered tasting better back in the day, and I had a Zebra Cake, which was sickeningly sweet, so much that it made me not want anything sweet for a long time. I spent today watching stuff, and other than some minimal food prep, I was lazy to my core. Headache or low energy excuses aside, and whether or not my miserable Aunt Flow comes, I am getting back on track tomorrow. I had an off week, that doesn't mean I'm throwing in the towel, I just needed to remember why it's important to get back in the game. I saw an article today whose title said something about how being on blood pressure medication long-term is strongly related to kidney disease. Funny, having high blood pressure is too. One of my long-term goals is to lower my blood pressure and get off blood pressure medicine. That isn't going to happen by not caring what I'm putting in my mouth. I weighed myself just for fun today and I was 198, the same place I was after my first month of keto. I don't like weighing myself as my primary measure of success. The way I feel is very telling. Time to back up the fun bus and turn this party in the right direction. Gotta treat every day like January 1st, where my mind is in the game and the possibilities are endless!