Getting Back on Track

A sigh is a funny thing, no? For instance, being perimenopausal coupled with hypothyroidism and I sigh a lot. My husband thinks I'm mad when I sigh, but usually it's because being a woman is tiring, isn't it? The to-do list never seems to shrink, no matter how many things I cross off. And I sigh because sometimes I don't sleep great or am pushing through despite really wanting a nap in the evening. But I sighed really big recently as I thought about all the indulgences that started before the holidays and just sort of kept rolling. There were Christmas gatherings for pizza and then burgers and the tray of homemade cookies from my dad's wife and wine-oh so much wine over the past month! Besides just Christmas, there was a giant blizzard and then a week of below zero (Fahrenheit) temperatures, plans and weather messing with our schedules, and my progesterone phase striking when I was trying to do 2 meals a day and longer fasts. Lets just say the weekends have been pure chaos and the week days saw me devouring peanuts in between meals which my brain told me I needed even when my stomach wasn't asking for them. I even started eating my candied ginger that I have stashed aside for when nausea strikes. Needless to say, the scale was up after all the indulgences. Before all this I was hovering between 153-155. I actually got up to 159 over the weekend before dipping down to 158 today. I know it's not life and death here, but those were pounds that were hard-won and I am bummed I slid backwards. The even scarier part was how I felt I was losing grip on the reins and starting to not care. That was a combination of the carbs and progesterone talking. Believe it or not, eating carbs actually depresses my mood and not because I feel guilty for eating them, it's biochemical. I made up my mind that my "holiday minset" was going to end by Sunday evening and I am going to try to stay clean for February, not just to celebrate better physically and when I step on the scale, but to help get my mind back to where it was before the Christmas festivities began. It's not that I was off plan the whole time, but the weekends were pretty loose and I was snacking on those nuts when I should have been giving my insulin a rest between meals. I didn't do so good with 2 meals a day, especially one day when I was shoveling snow for over an hour and even a few hours later, under multiple layers of clothes and blankets I couldn't warm up, and I finally figured out that I probably hadn't eaten enough to keep me warm. So I ended up not sticking to 2MAD. It was bad timing, and it led to me thinking about food way more than I ever do, which I haven't really struggled with since starting keto, other than progesterone phase (the week before the cycle starts). It always helps me to watch keto videos when I need to focus more, it inspires me because knowing the science of what sugars do in our bodies makes me want to better for my body, and learning about ketosis, fasting, and being metabolically healthy makes me want to keep trying to achieve that level of health! Fortunately, my cycle came this month. I never in a million years would have dreamed I would count it as a fortune, but after the PMS progesterone phase, it's so nice to get a release from those feelings of extreme exhaustion and wanting to eat the entire universe. On the months when I don't get a cycle, it just feels like a month of PMS. So, I am happy to get a little boost of estrogen, it makes me feel like not only is anything possible but I have the energy to accomplish it. I scheduled my annual physical today. I hage procrastinated scheduling it because the doctor I had last year was cold and I just know I can't build a rapport with her so I tried a few doctors who have great chart notes (I have the luxury of knowing since I'm a medical coder and look at charts all day long) but several are no longer taking new patients so I just took a newer doctor I don't know much about but his office is the closest to me so at least it's convenient. I'm going to discuss all the stuff I want to this time without being timid. I don't code for this doctor so there shouldn't be any weird feelings between us. Doctors knowing that I'm a medical coder can make them squirmy a litte because we basically make sure the doctors are only getting paid for what they documented they did, nothing more. A lot of doctors don't keep up on billing and coding rules so they get nervous that we're auditing them as they work. I'm not like that. Anyway, my physical is April 1 so that gives me 2 months to see what I can do with my weight. I'd love to be under 150 by then but I feel like that is a barrier that is so unobtainable so far. I am not sure what it's going to take but I am going to give it a try! I was 173 pounds at my last physical March 27,2023. I remember being so proud of my 33 pound loss at that time and the doctor didn't even acknowledge it. I remember thinking at the time, 'just you wait and see what I can do! Honestly, the fact that she didn't even acknowledge my weightloss is a huge reason I don't want to see her. Anyone who isn't willing to celebrate the wins isn't going to be very supportive when I hage a health issue either. I would think it would be easier for a doctor to congratulate a health victory than to have to scold people for not taking care of themselves. Anyway, I'll give the new guy a fair shake. I feel confident I can at least get back down to 153 by then, which is 20 extra pounds less than last year's physical. I am not exercising. Starting in mid or late December I started getting really bad pains in my achilles tendon area/heel. This is the one I had surgery on and recovered so well from. It was virtually pain-free until that point, then it started feeling like it did when I tore it. It's really tight and painful in the morning which makes it hard to walk at first. I just don't want any more problems with this tendon. I am taking ibuprofen and it does help so I am hoping I can rehab it conservatively at home. If it gets worse or isn't better by my physical I'll have it looked at. It's not to say I can't do anything. I have done some strengthening with workout bands while standing at my desk a couple times. It's just going to be a bit before I am super active with this heel. Hopefully getting back to consistently low carbs will help resolve the inflammation. My big street art project is finally in the works! I got this giant plastic fish that I am going to paint. It will be on display downtown in a neighboring high-traffic tourist town all summer, then it will be auctioned off and I get to keep half of what it auctions for! I have a good portion of one side done already and I have until May 6 to finish and turn it in. Here is the naked fish, and my progress so far.

It will keep me busy and I'm looking forward to the excellent exposure!