Monday, June 2, 2014

Good Start

It's amazing, when you're going through the struggle, how much of a triumph it seems that I did a workout.  Not a grueling, dig-down-deep, make-you-want-to-cry workout, just a workout.  For me, at this point, that is a triumph.  It's the doing when I don't want to that gives me my take THAT fire.  
I basically did my beginning physical therapy exercises with some body-weight-only deadlifts to try and balance out my quads and hams.  It felt OK, but I ended up spending nearly all day on my feet in flat sandals so by the time I left work, everything was sore.  But I didn't expect one workout to fix my issue, like everything, it's about consistency.  I made an effort today, that is more than I can say of most days.  It also made me naturally not crave junk food, even though I reminded myself I could eat whatever I want.  If anything, it was a good reminder of what is most important.  Being fat sucks, but being barely able to walk around without pain, in part because I make no effort to fix the situation?  Unacceptable and sad.  
I'm not bashing, just realizing how keeping my health poor is another way I was trying to get attention.  It's pathetic and counter-productive.  And to be honest, makes me feel worse about myself. 
Not going to drone on and on.  Just figuring a few things out.

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