With all the activity I had yesterday, I should have slept like a baby, but in reality, I got terrible sleep. I had an alarm set for 4:40am, which is the time I'd have to get up in order to get to the gym, but since I'd only fallen asleep about 4 hours earlier, I knew that wasn't going to happen. But fortunately, I go to work a little later today, so once I dropped the kids off at their grandma's house, I drove back, having the familiar inner argument with myself as to whether I should get a workout in or catch a little extra sleep.
The brilliant thing about that is, that I am having this inner dialogue at all, because a month ago I wasn't even considering working out, and I know where my mind is at by the decision I make.
My lower body was sore from yesterday, so I decided not to go to the gym for a lower body workout like I planned yesterday. So I decided to do some low intensity walking instead. I got a new app that helps me keep track of my intervals while playing my music, that was a huge help. I put in just under 45 minutes, and feel pretty good. I can't pretend it made me feel great, I am still wishing I had more sleep, but as I was walking I realized that I didn't make the decision to walk today because I'm thinking about how great I'll look in a tank top next summer, I made the decision because I don't want to end up back on blood pressure meds or worse. I don't want barriers between what I want to be able to do and to what my body can physically do. And I don't want to spend my life saying I should until so much time passes that I am left with I wish I would have...
So I walked when I didn't want to, but I know doing it will make my next steps that much easier. One foot in front of the other, nothing complicated, moving forward.