Setting my Sails

I went to my new dentist for a cleaning yesterday and I got an education and yet more health advice from the hygienist.  It was my first time getting a cleaning at this office and they are all so friendly and professional that I really don't mind going there.  It was so different than the cleanings I'd had at my old office.  This hygienist said she could see pits on my enamel, which was an indication of acid reflux.  She also said that reflux is linked to heart disease and because my blood pressure has been high in the past, she was worried about me.  She proceeded to tell me all the different things I could do/try as work-arounds for the things she mentioned, among them, chewing gum, taking baby aspirin and eating Activia yogurt.  Activia, she said, is the only yogurt on the market with both of the types of probiotics needed to combat the reflux. 
Activia is so delicious because it is loaded with sugars and low in protein.  But, being on thyroid medicine, antacids are not recommended because they interfere with the absorbtion of the medicine.  So, I may be working in the Activia.  This shouldn't cause the mental aversion that it does in me, but I did put myself in a mental trap last week by eating low-carb and adding a ton of veggies.  My stomach rejected that diet and then my "crazy aunt in the attic" (as Geneen Roth calls the negative self-talk we lecture ourselves with for eating bad foods) appeared to make me feel bad.  I ate out 3 times over the weekend, those foods did not upset my stomach but the veggies did.  Eating the "bad" foods made me feel odd because I was so structured and disciplined all week long.  But that rigid way of eating has always backfired on me.  I have such a hard time living in the middle; just eating mostly good but enjoying some other stuff too.  Luckily, the ease of meal prep and the structure of the work week come together to make things feel a little more natural, but I do really mess my brain up when I try to be too disciplined.  And there is that fine line between taste, variety, and foods with health benefits.  I am not one to notice every little macronutrient like my husband.  He can eat something unhealthy and his body feels bad.  Not me.  Unless I eat too much, but I don't physically feel bad from eating, say a slice or two of pizza or a sandwich and fries.  Maybe that's the problem, if there was adverse effect, other than beating ourselves up over it, it would be less attractive.  I can tell you, after a few days of feeling bad after adding more veggies to my diet, I sure didn't feel like eating them the rest of the week.  I did back off the veggies but had some fruit.  I think, more than anything, I am someone who wishes I could eat all that stuff and get some noticable benefit from it, but I just don't know that I do.  Sometimes I get so sick of thinking and planning with food that I just give up and eat whatever sounds good. 
I am trying to be sane this week.  I am eating egg salad on a low-carb light fluffy Wasa cracker for breakfast, peanuts and and apple for snack, chick'n with broccoli and terriyaki sauce for lunch, yogurt for my afternoon snacks (when I get to it) and taco salads for dinner.  Here and there I may sneak a handful of chips or a couple cookies but I don't binge on them.  Honestly, I don't have the ability to sit and gorge myself on sweets like I used to, my mouth gets overwhelmed by the taste too soon these days.  Sometimes, the idea of being "sweeted-out" is enough to prevent me from eating something sweet altogether.  I think, over the course of the summer, I want to start making small, positive changes in the amount of snacks and junk food coming in the house.  I'll get one less bag of chips and add some carrots with dill dip or cream cheese.  I'll have more fruits and veggies ready for the kids to enjoy so they don't feel like they are stuck with chips or sweets if they want a snack.  More options should mean they are chosing the healthy stuff at least some of the time, which is an improvement.  All stuff that just takes a little more effort/planning/ encouragement. 
I have said it since before the year changed, I think 2018 has some positive changes in store for me and I still feel it.  I am on my way and I feel the wind is about to kick up and push my sails and I am ready to go where the wind will take me. 

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