Day 1, Hard to Find my Groove
Day 1, I know thee all too well. And how very cliche of me to start 'the last diet of my life's on New Year's Day, so dramatic and full of hope.
I planned out my calories before shopping last weekend, and was a little surprised that I didn't have to cut out cheese altogether. In fact, I even had enough calories to budget a bean and cheese burrito into my menu this week. And I don't have to give up my favorite bedtime snack of cheese.
So here on my first day of tracking and calorie budgeting, I became aware of a couple things:
1. I nibble. While portioning out some walnuts into convenient 1oz baggies, some fell outside the baggie and it was so crazy obvious how my natural behavior is to just eat the ones that fall. I nibble while I am serving up my food, I nibble when my kids are enjoying a freshly popped bag of popcorn, I nibble and I wasn't aware how often I do it until I didn't do it today. I can't imagine how many calories that has added up to in any given day.
2. Day 1 always comes with doubt for me. Always.
3. Tracking isn't that hard but I Fitbit is less cut-and-dry than I need it to be. It based how many calories you are allowed in a given day based off how many calories you have burned. Now I can see the value of that on one hand; its much more accurate than giving yourself one set amount of calories for every day when some days you do very little activity (like me today) and other days you took an hour long hike in the mountains. One of those days would certainly call for more calories. But not being able to plan things makes it hard. I would be questioning whether or not I could afford the calories to put cheese on my salad or stretch my meals farther apart to save calories,etc. Now, I know I could solve this issue by always making sure I do some sort of activity, but I am not going to delude myself into thinking I will be active every day of my life. So I will have to decide on what my total calorie budget will be for a starting point. Today was not a typical day because I slept in and didn't have an afternoon snack. I do still have a formula hanging around in my filing cabinet somewhere. I will seek that out tonight.
3. My hunger signal is very inconsistent.
4. Hot tea and gum are good ways to distract myself from wanting to eat when I'm not physically hungry. I used both today.
5. There is a huge part of me that is ashamed about all of this. When I took my weight, measurements and especially my "before" photos today I did so quietly and while no one was paying attention. I am so accustomed to not reaching my goals that I don't want anyone focusing on it in case I fail.
6. While I can technically eat whatever I want, I can't do so with reckless abandon, so in that sense this is restrictive eating. My mind was so focused on food and eating today and that was a huge part of what made me doubt that I am ready. I wasn't excited about it today, I just did it because the calendar said today was the day. Which leads into the next point.
7. I need to make this enjoyable if it's going to stick. At 6pm when it was time for me to eat dinner, I had only eaten 790 calories for the day. I was conservative with my calories because I was hyper-focused on staying within budget. That led me to be under-budget even though I was pretty inactive today. One of the tips that the author whose plan I'm following gives is to use all your calories you are allowed, it will make you more satisfied mentally and physically so that you'll stick with it. I actually forgot that I had planned a bean burrito for dinner this week and had a cheeseburger salad (made with spinach, meatless burger crumbles, pickles, onion, ketchup, mustard, and olive oil mayo). The main reason I purposely put the bean burrito in the menu was because it's very satisfying and sticks with me a long time before I'm hungry again. Tonight I added cheese to my salad because I had the calories to spare, but even then, the salad ends up being 48 calories more than a naked bean burrito and less satisfying. I know nutritionally the salad is better, but I also know I'm going to be hungry again in less than 3 hours.
So I am at a point of the evening where I would typically only eat one more time before bed. My planned bedtime snack was 2.5 ounces f Colby cheese for 275 calories but since I'm so under calorie budget for the day I might have that bean burrito for my bedtime snack, and add a little cheese and sour cream. I'm still going to be under calorie budget for today but for day 1 I did my best. I will be awake more hours tomorrow and I plan to get up early to do something active.
Like all new things, there will be a learning curve to this. As day 1 winds down, I feel pretty good about my path so far. The doubt will fade as I find my groove.
I planned out my calories before shopping last weekend, and was a little surprised that I didn't have to cut out cheese altogether. In fact, I even had enough calories to budget a bean and cheese burrito into my menu this week. And I don't have to give up my favorite bedtime snack of cheese.
So here on my first day of tracking and calorie budgeting, I became aware of a couple things:
1. I nibble. While portioning out some walnuts into convenient 1oz baggies, some fell outside the baggie and it was so crazy obvious how my natural behavior is to just eat the ones that fall. I nibble while I am serving up my food, I nibble when my kids are enjoying a freshly popped bag of popcorn, I nibble and I wasn't aware how often I do it until I didn't do it today. I can't imagine how many calories that has added up to in any given day.
2. Day 1 always comes with doubt for me. Always.
3. Tracking isn't that hard but I Fitbit is less cut-and-dry than I need it to be. It based how many calories you are allowed in a given day based off how many calories you have burned. Now I can see the value of that on one hand; its much more accurate than giving yourself one set amount of calories for every day when some days you do very little activity (like me today) and other days you took an hour long hike in the mountains. One of those days would certainly call for more calories. But not being able to plan things makes it hard. I would be questioning whether or not I could afford the calories to put cheese on my salad or stretch my meals farther apart to save calories,etc. Now, I know I could solve this issue by always making sure I do some sort of activity, but I am not going to delude myself into thinking I will be active every day of my life. So I will have to decide on what my total calorie budget will be for a starting point. Today was not a typical day because I slept in and didn't have an afternoon snack. I do still have a formula hanging around in my filing cabinet somewhere. I will seek that out tonight.
3. My hunger signal is very inconsistent.
4. Hot tea and gum are good ways to distract myself from wanting to eat when I'm not physically hungry. I used both today.
5. There is a huge part of me that is ashamed about all of this. When I took my weight, measurements and especially my "before" photos today I did so quietly and while no one was paying attention. I am so accustomed to not reaching my goals that I don't want anyone focusing on it in case I fail.
6. While I can technically eat whatever I want, I can't do so with reckless abandon, so in that sense this is restrictive eating. My mind was so focused on food and eating today and that was a huge part of what made me doubt that I am ready. I wasn't excited about it today, I just did it because the calendar said today was the day. Which leads into the next point.
7. I need to make this enjoyable if it's going to stick. At 6pm when it was time for me to eat dinner, I had only eaten 790 calories for the day. I was conservative with my calories because I was hyper-focused on staying within budget. That led me to be under-budget even though I was pretty inactive today. One of the tips that the author whose plan I'm following gives is to use all your calories you are allowed, it will make you more satisfied mentally and physically so that you'll stick with it. I actually forgot that I had planned a bean burrito for dinner this week and had a cheeseburger salad (made with spinach, meatless burger crumbles, pickles, onion, ketchup, mustard, and olive oil mayo). The main reason I purposely put the bean burrito in the menu was because it's very satisfying and sticks with me a long time before I'm hungry again. Tonight I added cheese to my salad because I had the calories to spare, but even then, the salad ends up being 48 calories more than a naked bean burrito and less satisfying. I know nutritionally the salad is better, but I also know I'm going to be hungry again in less than 3 hours.
So I am at a point of the evening where I would typically only eat one more time before bed. My planned bedtime snack was 2.5 ounces f Colby cheese for 275 calories but since I'm so under calorie budget for the day I might have that bean burrito for my bedtime snack, and add a little cheese and sour cream. I'm still going to be under calorie budget for today but for day 1 I did my best. I will be awake more hours tomorrow and I plan to get up early to do something active.
Like all new things, there will be a learning curve to this. As day 1 winds down, I feel pretty good about my path so far. The doubt will fade as I find my groove.
Congrats! You learned some new things. I think of it as en experiment - there isn't success or failure per se, just feedback. Especially when you are just starting out!
ReplyDeleteSo true! It will feel more real the more distance I put between me and the starting line!
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