Sometimes, Just UGH

This weekend was a mess.  Granted, the sun was out on Saturday and it felt like spring, but the ground was a mess with half-melted, half-iced over snow that made walking around challenging, and I was on dog duty all weekend with no relief, so I was sopping wet and freezing. 
I will admit, there was some anxiety bubbling in me about today's appointment with the podiatrist.  I always have this doubt before I see a doctor, plan out how I will tell them as much as I can without wasting their time but still giving adequate information, and so many times I leave the office with doubt.  On the other hand, I really didn't want to hear that I need surgery.  I comfort ate more than once on the weekend, but it was only a couple handfulls of chips, not a full-on binge.  At one point, my son and I were running to Target for something and of course they have the lovely pictures of the latest Starbucks drinks and I was drooling.  I wanted one so bad, but I had already had my two cups of coffee, plus, the drinks I really like from there are loaded with sugar.  So I passed on it, but I want to tell you, it PISSED ME OFF that I have to pass on something I want.  That was one of my comfort-eating sessions.  Dieting makes me irritated and yet, being in some mode of control with my eating is needed because when I simply chalk it up to "mindful eating", which I have apparently not mastered yet, I just go off the hinges.  So there was that little bit.  But I was already in a funk for my dog not pooping for me until I about killed my foot walking, 3 half-hour or more sessions on Sunday.  Yes, I reached more than 12,000 steps that day, but when your foot hurts, that's not necessarily the best thing. 
This morning we had a meeting at the older son's school and it led to my younger one having to ride his scooter to school.  Luckily we only live a block and a half to school for him, but it was driving rain, with a huge coating of snow-slush and ice already on the roads, and the wind was whipping around at about 25mph.  I had the worst case of mom guilt you ever saw from him having to ride to school in that, we just couldn't be in two places at once.  The meeting was good, though and I got over my morning bummer feelings. 
I got to my podiatry appointment just in the nick of time and they whisked me down a hall and took my blood pressure ( I was still not calmed down from walking with a limp so I knew it would be high).  It was lower than I thought it would be.  Yay me!  I briefly recapped what happened with the foot and before I knew it I was up in a big chair in the air and the doctor came in to ask a few questions.  He reviewed my X-rays with me.  I have a high arch.  OK.  My toes have grown all on a slant, this a deformation from birth, the only way to correct it now would be to break all the toes at the joint and reset them properly.  No thanks.  I have arthritic spurs in my heel.  Great.  What's this? There are two little bones that sit beneath the big toe, except, I had three.  Which means one of those bones broke at some point.  Not sure if it was the cause of the pain because the pain has really improved since then so he's not concerned.  Don't think there's anything he could have done about it at this point anyway.  I have something called metatarsalagia, swelling in the pad of the foot because having high arches forces pressure on the front of the foot.  He tested my tendons (I'm guessing, he didn't explain things as he did them, he seemed quite rushed actually) by vibrations from a metal tine.  None of the vibrations hurt.  When he was feeling around it was all still tender but I didn't have extraordinary pain.  He sent me home with a recommendation to try some inserts in my shoes, and to eventually have orthotics professionally made, oh and by the way, return to your normal activities.  Umm, I'm still limping and hurting.  What do these doctors think?  I felt just as confused leaving there as I did going in.  What was the large snapping sound that caused all the pain and how can I avoid it happening again?  He did say that sometimes when feet are "deformed" as mine are that it can pinch nerves and cause neurological problems.  What?  I got rid of the pinched nerve feeling when the horrible snap happened, but much more pain followed.  So I don't know.  He did say that he could write me a prescription for a different anti-inflammatory drug that doesn't raise blood pressure if I was still in pain.  I am just over the whole thing.  I don't think it's inflammed, it just isn't healed yet, so I declined it for now.  I will try the cheapest insert to see if I can tolerate it and go from there.  I will also talk to my chiropractor about it and see what he thinks because I really trust his advice. 
So I guess I will just keep rocking on how I'm rocking and put this whole thing behind me.  I don't need surgery, that's a blessing!   I have faith the rest will work itself out somehow. 


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