The past two weeks, it has been markedly darker when I am out for my walk in the 5am hour. For me, it is a mix of slightly eerie and kind of cool, as it seems like it is late evening rather than early morning. Today, the darkness was punctuated by fog and a high level of humidity, which made the earth release a sweet smell from her vegetation, and had a multitude of animals still scurrying about while I interrupted their morning feast.
I have been increasingly amazed at how sudden the sun rises, at precisely the last two minutes of my walk, during my cool down, it seems to just pop up, like someone springing a surprise, and every single time, a huge smile spreads across my face. No matter what else happens in my day, I have that incredible moment.
This morning as the sun popped up, I realized how symbolic it is for how I feel right now. I had been in a bit of a funk as of late, and something just suddenly popped up and woke me from the drudgery. And I am basking in it with an internal smile that seems ever-present. I have been making things happen, taking back the control, feeling really strong mentally and physically, and even (gulp) seeing my dreaded arms tighten up. I am looking toward the future as a challange, a series of goals I can keep conquering, and know that I am more than strong enough. From my current vantage point I know that the light has always been there, it just took me til now to learn how to let it shine.