I don't want to jinx anything but my work has been much more sane the past couple days. What a gift it's been to be able to get caught up on things and clear some of the clutter both literally and figuratively!
Yesterday I woke up feeling refreshed and happy and even started thinking of new ideas for displays for the salesfloor at work. I was right when I said having a little bit of peace in my head would help with other areas, I didn't even think about food in a longing way. I did have a mini bag of Skinny Girl hint of lime popcorn and it was really good, way less salt and grease than typical micowave popcorn.
Yesterday was a getting-things-done kind of day for me. I rescheduled two upcoming appointments and made a new appointment for myself, one that took some courage, with an endodontist. My dentist referred me to him to do a root canal on my molar that cracked. I was initially considering just having it pulled because I was thinking it would be less hassel, but I was never fully happy with the thought of doing that. So after researching a little bit on-line I made the command decision that I was going to try and save the tooth. I am worth it; I'm worth the time off that I'll be asking for (because I might also need a different specialist to reshape my gums in that area in order to have the crown fit right) and I am worth the extra money it will cost. I'd rather put this effort and financial investment in now than live 40 more years with that tooth gone. Just making that decision and setting up the appointment made me feel better. I sure will be glad when all my dental issues are fixed and I can just maintain.
I have also been making a little time to just sit in peace. I let it envelope me and try to get my thoughts focused on how quiet it is. I've been lucky to have some quiet time to appreciate the past couple nights. I did come up with an idea though, that when I get to my car after work at night, I can use the time that it takes to warm my car up, to sit quietly and enjoy the peace as a way of creating a mental separation between where I am leaving and where I am going. I can do the same thing when I get to work, before getting out of my car, because mornings are stressful trying to get my kids ready and to the bus on time. So maybe making a practice of "separating the stresses" will give me some grounding in between, enough to help keep my head on straight.
So I have been thinking about focus and goals, since an arbitrary number on the scale isn't really driving me right now, and I came up with one. At the clinic where I work, my office is in the basement, which means that I occassionally have to trudge upstairs for something. There are 23 stairs from the basement to the main floor and by the time I get to the top, most days I am huffing pretty good. And if I have to go up more than one flight? Don't ask! Yes, we have an elevator, but I always feel silly using it since my legs are fine, I'm just overweight. So, my goal is to get to a point where walking up that one flight of 23 stairs is breezy and I'm not breathing harder. The only way to make that happen is cardio. I have been totally slacking on it. I've been super lazy for too long and I think setting a goal might help. I am interested how long it will take to acheive. I go up those stairs at least every Monday and Tuesday night so I will be able to measure on a weekly basis, though I don't know if I will. Maybe to make it easier to assess I'll take my pulse.
There it is, a new goal, no scale or bathing suit involved. Here goes nothing!