Dancing Shoes
Today was the 1st day of my "Holiday Health and Wellness" challenge through work. For 5 weeks I have to get 150 minutes of cardio exercise per week and complete one other challenge. Week one is to take at least 5 minutes a day to myself to "de-stress". I can choose anything that makes me feel relaxed. I am thinking of attempting to meditate, it is something I have been wanting to get in the habit of anyway.
This morning after I got my kids to school I wanted nothing more than to just sink into a big comfy chair by the fire and do miscellaneous stuff on my phone until I had to get ready for work, but I knew if I sat down I wouldn't get back up to do my 30 minutes of cardio, so I went straight to my room and began dancing. I actually danced for 36 minutes and then took a cool down by walking around. I got to a point where I felt so good that when a song that is perfect for jumping came on I began jumping and then eventually started jogging inside the house for a few minutes. I was happy that nothing hurt after that. It was actually fun to get my sweat on. It's been a long long time since I have done any cardio and it lifted my mood quite a bit and gave me energy that I certainly didn't have before doing it. So that was a huge win. My cool down song was the same I've been using for a couple years, and I never get sick of it: Brave by Sara Bareilles. For some reason when that song came on today it just hit me all over in the feels and I started to feel tears escaping my eyes. The lyrics feel so real for me and this being quiet and caged and out of the way has been my own personal plague always so it really hit me, and that opened up some things for me that need deeper examination in order to heal and grow from them. And maybe to free myself from the cage and let a little sunlight in.
This week, because things were feeling rushed for grocery shopping, I decided to just eat what I really like. I am having bean burritos and turkey sandwiches. I keep thinking back to a blog that I read that was a weight loss success story and he said the only way he can keep going is because he will only eat food that he genuinely likes. I think all too often I have been forcing myself to eat things that I want to like because they are good for me, but I genuinely don't like. Then I really struggle to stay on track and fall back to old comforts that taste good. Everytime I am tyring to plan how I SHOULD eat I get frustrated with the multitudes of confusion and I give it all up and just eat what I want. I know I will get things cleaned up once I figure out what way I want to go, but right now it's too much weight on my brain. Even something as simple as giving up dairy made me feel like I was on a leash and slipping meant I was weak and lazy. I don't like that.
So I have plenty to think about during my quiet time. Hopefully I will come up with a new path than the last umteenth million times I have begun fresh in hopes of conquering this blobby body once and for all.
This morning after I got my kids to school I wanted nothing more than to just sink into a big comfy chair by the fire and do miscellaneous stuff on my phone until I had to get ready for work, but I knew if I sat down I wouldn't get back up to do my 30 minutes of cardio, so I went straight to my room and began dancing. I actually danced for 36 minutes and then took a cool down by walking around. I got to a point where I felt so good that when a song that is perfect for jumping came on I began jumping and then eventually started jogging inside the house for a few minutes. I was happy that nothing hurt after that. It was actually fun to get my sweat on. It's been a long long time since I have done any cardio and it lifted my mood quite a bit and gave me energy that I certainly didn't have before doing it. So that was a huge win. My cool down song was the same I've been using for a couple years, and I never get sick of it: Brave by Sara Bareilles. For some reason when that song came on today it just hit me all over in the feels and I started to feel tears escaping my eyes. The lyrics feel so real for me and this being quiet and caged and out of the way has been my own personal plague always so it really hit me, and that opened up some things for me that need deeper examination in order to heal and grow from them. And maybe to free myself from the cage and let a little sunlight in.
This week, because things were feeling rushed for grocery shopping, I decided to just eat what I really like. I am having bean burritos and turkey sandwiches. I keep thinking back to a blog that I read that was a weight loss success story and he said the only way he can keep going is because he will only eat food that he genuinely likes. I think all too often I have been forcing myself to eat things that I want to like because they are good for me, but I genuinely don't like. Then I really struggle to stay on track and fall back to old comforts that taste good. Everytime I am tyring to plan how I SHOULD eat I get frustrated with the multitudes of confusion and I give it all up and just eat what I want. I know I will get things cleaned up once I figure out what way I want to go, but right now it's too much weight on my brain. Even something as simple as giving up dairy made me feel like I was on a leash and slipping meant I was weak and lazy. I don't like that.
So I have plenty to think about during my quiet time. Hopefully I will come up with a new path than the last umteenth million times I have begun fresh in hopes of conquering this blobby body once and for all.
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