Glut of the Gut

The Black Friday food hangover is evident in every face I have met today.  Even my kids are looking like sleepy little balls of unmotivation, despite having a relatively mellow day. 
My husband flew off to Puerto Rico yesterday morning, and it completely overwhelmed me all yesterday.  He will only be gone until Monday, doing a photo shoot with a somewhat known photographer there, but watching him drive off, and having him away for a holiday, made it tough on me.  I got a huge knot in my stomach and lump in my throat as I was watching him finish packing, and rechecking his itinerary.  Then, after he pulled out of the driveway, I started pacing, so much nervous energy.  I immediately got the urge to comfort eat.  So after about an hour of slowly getting the kids ready, we went to do a little shopping for a mix of winter/Christmas/food shopping.  And by food, I mean non-food, calorie/sugar/fat-laden junk.  But after bingeing on it, I still felt empty and edgy. 
We went to my mother-in-law's house for Thanksgiving dinner, which is always so warm and welcoming, but all I kept thinking about was her son, my husband, and praying for each leg of his travel to go without a hitch.  Dinner was fantastic and we ate reasonable amounts, followed by pumpkin pie.  However, after indulging in all the snacks beforehand, we were all so overfull to the point of discomfort.  That is the Thanksgiving tradition, right?  An excuse for glutonous comsumption of food and alcohol.  Thankfully, I didn't indulge in any alcohol, I had nowhere to put it! 
As we were leaving, my husband called; a rare treat as most of our conversations these days happen by way of text messages.  Just hearing his voice made me choke up, though it was a fairly uneventful conversation.  It made me realize how much of a hole there would be inside of me if we were ever separated.  Ah, absence, you can suck it!
When the kids and I got home, we put up our tiny tree and decorated it with our humble homemade decorations.  I nibbled on a few candy canes while we decorated, not really wanting them, and still overfull, but still trying to fill all the empty inside of me.  We all went to bed full and swearing never to eat that much again.  Another tradition.  By the time I went to bed, I had already planned to get up and do cardio this morning, to try and combat both my mindless eating and all the extra calories consumed yesterday.  I slept horribly, left my phone on "vibrate" in case my husband texted to let me know he'd made it to Puerto Rico, even though he told me he wouldn't because it would be too late.  Everytime it buzzed I had to look.  I was up a lot.  So when the alarm woke me at 4:50am, I nearly didn't get up, but I knew I had to.  And the cardio session was awesome.  I had my usual breakfast and some coffee, and by the time we left the house I felt fairly good, despite.  While it defies good sense, I weighed myself, just to see how much damage I did yesterday.  I could tell I was retaining a ton of water by how tight my ring got overnight, but the scale showed only 1 pound gained.  Today will be all about intaking fluids. 
I feel a little better today, mentally, and don't have as much nervous, displaced energy.  I think the boys and I will have a fun weekend, and we will be welcoming my husband home before we know it.  Then, I will be able to get back to the treadmill, and that will be very therapeudic.  If anything, it has been yet another learning experience.  I think it was the Barenaked Ladies who said "Absence makes the heart grow fungus."  I don't know about that, but it sure does make me binge! 
So with a sigh, I release yet another glutonous holiday from my mind, and gear up on getting in a good place before the next one hits!
Hope you all had a great week!


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