Today my body feels like a brittle, aged tree succoming to fierce January winds, and all I can do is hunker down and hope it doesn't uproot me. After a few days of beautiful weather, it is brutally cold and exceptionally windy today, and my body is protesting.
I have been losing sleep due to my metabolism, and that has led to my immune system being compromised enough to catch the cold my kids both have. It is just a swollen throat and a bit of the sniffles at this point, and I'm hoping I can keep it at bay. This morning, despite drinking more than the usual amount of caffeine, I felt over-tired and had absolutely no desire to move. So I decided to put off my workout til this afternoon. Procrastination rarely ever pays off, and today is no exception. It was supposed to be a weight training day, but I also knew I couldn't go "all out" today and tax my central nervous system too severly, or I will regret it when my cold turns into something worse. So, my idea was to walk to the park about 2 blocks away, and use the equipment to do some non-weight strength training such as step-ups and bench dips. By the time I made the five minute walk to the park, it was painfully obvious that my body did not want me to be out in the frigid winds, much less be requiring it to burn some non-existent energy source. My knee was already feeling the forecasted rain/snow storm that is approaching, and it wasn't going to be doing me any service to ignore the aggrivation. So, I decided that I am calling in sick today. Rather, listening to my body and having a rest. I may dig out my ancient yoga video and do some gentle stretching later, but that will be the extent of it. And I'm OK with that.
I finally made myself a 'bucket list' of sorts. I felt a little silly doing it, because some of the things were pretty outlandish, but then again, that's why they call it dreaming, right? What I discovered is that, my dream of doing something in the culinary arts is not going away. So I finally took the next step and found a few schools in the area that have degrees in the field. A kind of excitement I haven't felt in a long time washed over me as I looked at the described courses, wishing I could immerse myself in them right now. When I get a job, I will take serious strides toward making that happen. I feel really excited that I have finally decided where I truly want to focus my energies, and that excitement reignites my drive for what I am doing now, on this weight loss journey. Life is funny like that, a continuum of interrelated inspirations. It took a little bit of apathy to get me to this point, and a lot of trial and error. But that's the reason it has worked so brilliantly. If it were easy, everyone would be a fitness model. If it were easy, we would never learn anything about ourselves, and the journey would have little meaning. Here's to the tough stuff in life bringing out the best of us!