Little Wish-Fulfiller

Last night I did successfully do a few of the things on my "makes me feel good" list.  I snuggled with my dog, took a hot bath, did some stretching and watched an episode of The Office with my husband before bed.  While those things did make me feel good, my comment to my husband was what made me feel even better, "I think I am going to make this Saturday a veg-out day.  Rent a couple movies, and just plain chill out."  He said he thought that was a good idea with all the madness that is headed our way with the move, the holidays and the busiest month of the year at my work.  I will be turning 44 at the end of December too.  Gosh, it looks different in print than it does when I say it in passing.  Still, I feel young at heart so it truly is just a number. 
I did find a few yoga poses to try last night, and they were fine, but I going to have to put some more time into finding something that I like as far as poses that make me feel good and move at a pace that my body needs.  I have a DVD that has some great poses on, but it moves too quickly from one pose to the next, just enough time for me to sense that a spot is tight and needs a good stretch.  I could always pause in between poses, what a pain.  I know there's a  million Youtube videos, it's just that it takes so long to watch and try them.  Anyone have a good, gentle and slow yoga video or DVD they can recommend?  Advice is apprciated!
Today as I was driving to work I became aware that I feel sad today, and I don't really have a reason that I can think of.  Could be hormonal or the seasons changing or just being tired.  I think I need some kind of change.  I have been feeling this way for a bit.  It could be a major life change like a new job, or something small like a different haircut.  Maybe I'm just restless.  My biggest anxiety-invoking thing is about to happen (snow) and I will be forced to deal with it and it will remind me of how I was almost out of the snow permanently, and how my move to Sacramento didn't happen, and how I feel cheated of my dream.  Whoa is me.  I need to meditate on it.  But when I think of these things today, I don't really feel an emotional charge from them in a way that would indicate that they are the cause of my suffering today.  I am just being mindful of it, whatever it is, it will come to the surface and I'll deal with it. 
On the positive side, we had a ladybug in our house today.  I have always loved them, and I am always curious about symbolism so when I looked it up, I was pleasantly surprised to see that they symbolize luck, particularly in the way of new ventures and wishes being fulfilled. 
We saw a ton of them at the beach last weekend, floating on leaves in the water, sunning themselves on the sand, and even this one hiding in a shell.  It may seem silly, but whenever I start to see a lot of a certain thing, I take it as nature trying to send me a message.  The fact that ladybugs are a happy, positive sign acutally makes me feel good.  While all of the symbolism pages had roughly the same meaning for ladybug symbolism, one went further to say that they are the symbol that you are about to get past a struggle you've been having and that something that seemed unclear or acted as an obstacle will be removed.  Another said that it is believed if you tell a ladybug your wish, it will come true.  What a lovely belief!  I'm glad that little ladybug decided to come into our house and warm itself.  Although I already feel fortunate, a little luck and clearing of obstacles would be even better.  I did buy a lottery ticket yesterday, so you never know right? Ha ha.  The only way winning the lottery would make me happy is if it meant I could be a Snowbird.  I don't think that's in the cards for me, ladybug or not.  Guess I'll have to learn to make my own happiness.  Maybe that's the secret the ladybug is working on for me, the gift is in learning that we make our own happiness.  That's a pretty precious gift to recieve, isn't it?   
Here's to ladybugs and Fridays and the potential to veg out a little!  Have a good weekend!


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